The Power of a Compliment

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the power of a compliment

“You have really beautiful legs.”

The year was 1995 and I was a waitress at Ruby’s Diner in Santa Barbara while attending college. The compliment was not from some guy trying to pick me up, but rather, an old lady who was dining out with her husband. She said it in a way that was very matter-of-fact, and, genuine.  I will never forget where I was standing.

I was wearing a pinstriped dress, apron, suntan nylons and white tennies, the Ruby’s uniform, in which I didn’t feel particularly beautiful. Especially with the extra college pounds I had put on that year thanks to pizza, beer and bagels. It was a season of my life when my self-esteem was at its lowest.

She made me remember, I did have nice legs, even with the + 15 – 20 lbs and her genuine compliment lifted me up at a time when I needed it.

The rest of my shift, I had a bounce in my step and felt uplifted. And here we are, almost 20 years later, and I still remember it vividly, because of the way she made me feel.

The Power of a Compliment 

The power of a compliment is a beautiful thing, it’s a gift.  Not only that you give someone else, but it also is a gift to yourself too, because when you see the reaction when you give a genuine compliment, it makes you feel good too.

Since that time, I have made an effort, when I think something nice about someone, to tell them.

If we have really great service at a restaurant, I will tell the server, and have the manager come over so I can tell them too, just how awesome our server was.

If I think someone I know is smart, or talented, or looks particularly beautiful, or if I admire their parenting, or pretty much, whatever it is that I genuinely think that is positive to myself, I say it to them.

I am trying to teach this to my children too.

At my youngest’s soccer game last weekend, our awesome team mom had put together these amazing game treats for the kids.  My oldest daughter said to me, “Mrs. Wilson is a REALLY good team mom.” I told my daughter, “Yes, she IS! You should tell her that! It will make her feel good.”

I would encourage you to give it a try.  If a thought crosses your mind that is positive about someone else, if you are with them, say it right there out loud, or pick up the phone and call or text.  I guarantee you will make someone’s day.

8 Comments

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  1. 1
    Susanne says:

    What an awesome post! You are really great at giving compliments- this post is a great reminder. And you DO have great legs!!! Xo

    • 2
      jen says:

      Thank you Sus! And every compliment I give you I mean with my whole heart!

  2. 3
    Sara says:

    Wonderful advice & a great reminder!

    • 4
      jen says:

      Thank YOU for the compliment 🙂

  3. 5
    Gina Wilson says:

    When Emma told me I was a great team mom it melted my heart! It did make my day!!!!

    • 6
      jen says:

      Gina – for the record – you ARE the BEST Team Mom!!!! Thank you for taking the time to read my post. xoxo

  4. 7
    christy says:

    Love this! And I absolutely agree, 100% – always take that extra few seconds to give that well-deserved compliment!

    • 8
      jen says:

      Thank you Christy!!

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