The Pregnancy Diaries…
Here it is, my BIG gender reveal! I know, I know. We weren’t going to find out. Really, we weren’t, but my Type A personality just couldn’t stand it. We just went in for our 21-week ultrasound and found out that we are having a…
…girl! A little girl, another little princess, a sweet, delicate bundle of little girl joy. Our whole family is thrilled, and my husband and I cannot stop smiling and cooing over the fact that we are expecting a little “pink” one.
And this pint-sized angel was bouncing around happily, stretching her legs completely out and doing leg presses while on the ultrasound screen. So far, she looks very healthy, praise God, and we were just mesmerized by her tiny little perfectly formed body, her powerful kicks and pokes, and her long stretches.
To be honest, we almost didn’t find out what we were having (and by almost, I mean we were 99.9999% sure we were on “team green”). Team green – another new pregnancy term I learned this time around…meaning that the parents do not want to find out what they are having.
Actually, my hubby was 100% on team green, until a few days prior to the ultrasound. What changed his mind? Well, funny story…
My husband did not want to find out the baby’s sex with either of our big kids.
And each time, being the sweet, loving (and smart!) man that he is, he agreed to find out what we were having. And of course, it ended up being one girl and one boy. So as the story goes (and I still maintain to this day that I don’t quite remember the exact moment I made this commitment), he made me promise that if we ever had a third child, we’d wait until the delivery room.
And I apparently promised. It was right after I had our son (I mean, right after), so I was pretty sure we were DONE. I wasn’t planning on having a third, so sure, why not?! And I promised. And he promised I could name the kiddo (which was huge!).
Fast forward almost 5 years later, and that promise was still lingering. Well not lingering, so much as a bright flashing neon light over this pregnancy. I promised. And I keep my promises. But boy, was it bugging me. You know how some people love surprises? You know how some people are motivated by the element of surprise? I am not one of those people.
So my hubby, my family, and my friends had lots of fun “lovingly” teasing me over the course of the first trimester, and into my second. And people loved, loved guessing what it was going to be – by the way I was carrying, to how big I am (Yes, I am baby huge this time. No, it is not twins, I promise. Yes, we had them triple check.), to pretty much every pregnancy symptom I was having.
I was told girl, boy, twins…you name it.
And I wanted a boy. And I wanted a girl. Truly, I didn’t care. With each pregnancy, my husband and I are thrilled to be parents and to have a baby – the sex of the baby really doesn’t matter to us. I just love to know. So I can plan and nest and organize and prepare. I know I’m crazy, but this actually relaxes me (yes, I know, I know – I’m nuts). And, he’s always wanted that special, magical moment in the delivery room of , “It’s a ________!”
It became clearer and clearer that this Type-A mama was not getting out of her promise. I would wander around the Target baby section and just sniff over the ONE somewhat gender neutral onsie they seemed to have in stock. And my mid-point ultrasound was looming, getting closer, and starting to stress me out.
See, my hubs is waaaayyyy more patient and chill than I am (and thank God for that!). So in his mind, this was totally not a big deal. I believe he told me…grab a couple of white onesies, buy two sets of wall decals (one boy, one girl), drag all the newborn girl and boy stuff (we saved) upstairs to the baby’s room, and then wait.
Once the baby was born, slap on the few wall decals I want, wash a load of baby clothes, and put on the sheets I wanted. Done, done and done. What was the big deal?
To fellow Type-B’ers, this probably sounds very reasonable. To my fellow Type-A’ers, can you back me up here?!?! Our sweet little one is due one week before my son starts kindergarten and my daughter starts 2nd grade. Not exactly the time I want to be nesting and decorating and “preparing” for baby – with the chaos of school, carpools, homework, activities, and little (to no) sleep.
So I asked my husband a very simple question – why was it so important for him to wait?
Did he really, really want to wait for a specific reason? Or was it just fun to tease me…and fun to wait and see for the heck of it? Did he want 40 people in the hospital waiting room for that Hollywood moment of “It’s a _____!!!!” (His answer was no). Did he want a big gender reveal party (nope). Because if it was that important to him, of course I would keep my promise.
And it was important to him for several very good reasons. I’ll spare you the details of our 4 or 5 (or 10!) discussions about it. But bottom line, he told me that as important as it was for him to be surprised, it wasn’t as important to him as it was important to me to find out.
He wasn’t “giving in” for any other reason other than he knew this pregnancy has been very difficult for me (it really has), and that he knew that finding out would bring me a lot of enjoyment and a lot of fulfillment – nesting and planning and preparing and such (very important to us Type-A’ers).
He is such a sweet man, truly he is. And I so appreciate him, and him being extra supportive, especially when I was the one breaking our pact.
In my humble Type-A opinion, you can either be surprised at 20 weeks, or be surprised at 40 weeks. Either is a surprise, and either will bring you joy, wonder and excitement. My hubby and I just had different visions of when we wanted to be surprised.
And yes, both of our kids wanted to know asap. And yes, both were thrilled. Because both wanted a baby sister (even my little man – he was adamant about wanting a little sis to watch over and protect). So everyone was as happy as could be. And my husband and I were beyond thrilled that the baby was healthy.
So I’m curious – who else out there in our readership has been (or is!) “team green?” Did you keep your commitment to wait? Or did the suspense get to you??? Did both you and your partner want to wait, or was it a split household? Any Type-Aer’s out there like me who wanted to find out more than anything???
That’s all for now from my “Pregnancy Diaries.” As always, thank you so much for your support and sweet comments – they make my day!!!